Cool Remarks 18-01-09

• Marriage is like the army. Everybody complains, but you'd be surprised at how many re-enlist.

• "Congratulations on your wedding day! Too bad no one likes your wife."

• Don't worry about the world ending today... It's already tomorrow in Australia. (unless you're in Australia -then start worrying)

• I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

• It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, do it then.

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